Tweets During Grammys Ask ‘Who is Paul McCartney?’

Paul McCartney. The name alone has this sort of legendary status to it. There is only one Paul McCartney, one John Lennon, one Ringo Starr, and one that other guy (just kidding, I mean George Harrison). Much like Elvis, Elton John, Keith Richards or Jimi Hendrix, the name carries this common-knowledge type of immortal weight to it. Ray Charles. Bob Dylan. Aretha Franklin. Even if you don’t listen to their music, even if you can’t name a single song they wrote, you still know who they are.

So I didn’t immediately comprehend what happened to Paul McCartney on Twitter during the Grammys when a friend casually mentioned it.

Evidently, during Paul McCartney’s performance at the Grammys, a number of people Tweeted, “Who is Paul McCartney?” I wish they were trying to be sarcastic, but it was a genuine question. They had no idea. I wish I were kidding. I’m not.

“Wait who the f— is this Paul McCartney dude??”

“who the hell is paul mccartney lmao he hella old ! @grammys”

“im about to sounds naiive as F but who the hell is Paul McCartney??? this song sucks btw”

I typically caution my writers not to make assumptions in their articles. I’m going to break my own rule here and assume all these Tweets were made by preteens and those who just broke puberty. If you’re above 18-years-old and don’t know who Paul McCartney is then you must be in a coma since at least 1959, or you think music is what they play in elevators.

I’m sorry, tweeners. Did you ask who Paul McCartney is? Did you actually guess that he is “Jesse McCartney’s dad or uncle :s” when you couldn’t figure it out?

First, I’m going to explain just who Sir Paul Wildcat McCartney is (his middle name might not be Wildcat). Then I’m going to end by stating I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.

Hey, children, listen up for a moment (if this sounds condescending because it was written by someone barely in their 20’s, well, it is). I know you’re busy memorizing the words to every J-Biebs song and thinking that you’re cool because you can quote Lil’ Wayne, but pull up a seat. I’m going to educate you on “who the hell is Paul McCartney.”

First, and I mean this in the most sincere, straightforward way, with absolutely no sarcasm: have you ever heard of The Beatles? Yes? Okay, you have heard of The Beatles. Can you guess where this is going?

Right, Sir Paul McCartney was one of the founding members of The Beatles. Why do I keep stressing the Sir before his name? Because the Queen of England actually knighted him for his services to music.

You find me a stupid Jonas Brother or Drake or whatever nonsense you kids worship these days that has the talent to become an actual knight because of the music they make.

Not only did Paul McCartney form what is arguably the most influential band in the history of music, he also pursued a successful solo career when they broke up, constantly pumping out amazing scores, pop music, classical music, going on tours, holding events and did I mention being hailed as “the greatest composer of the millennium” by BBC News Online? That one is probably lost on you Chris Brown fans since you don’t know what a composer is (hint: a composer is anyone who makes music).

Thank you, @ChaseUlven, for daring to say, “Who the hell is Paul McCartney #OldFart” in your Tweet of the Grammys. Yes, he is an “OldFart.” Of course, being that The Beatles were formed in the 1960’s, and this is 2012, well, let’s see. Carry the 1, add a healthy dose of ignorance, minus the ability to do even a brief Google search and we have, that’s right, you’re a waste of procreation.

“Who’s George Washington? Was he in The Beatles?” “Nah, he made Star Wars. You’re thinking of someone else.” | Nathaniel St. Amour/The Minaret

Now, I can respect anyone who didn’t care for his performance or didn’t like his song (by that I mean, you have your opinion, I have mine). Some of the Twitter users confused by who he was though resorted to calling him old.

Contrary to popular belief (and it pains me that this is, apparently, a popular belief) old people can be famous too. I say that as a young writer for a student newspaper. Have you heard of George Washington? Maybe Abraham Lincoln? What about Harrison Ford? George Lucas? Ray Bradbury? Kurt Vonnegut? Nah, forget them old dudes.

So, to recap, because I know you angsty 15-year-olds who can navigate Tumblr with ease but are clueless about what a legend is, we have: Sir Paul McCartney, founder of The Beatles, winner of over a hundred different accolades, one of the greatest musicians of last century, Guinness record setter and a damn knight.

If anyone wants to argue why I’m an idiot and your boy Jay-Z is a real music artist, not Paul McCartney, please find my email address below and send me your brilliant argument.

Until then, I’m going to plaster screenshots of your Tweets all over this article and enjoy humiliating you.

#ShutUpAndPutOnADayInTheLifeYouCluelessTwits

Rich Solomon can be reached at r.solomon14@gmail.com.